solo-kun’s blog

Fashion wise, well, they can try to be. Whether they succeed or not is in the eyes of the beholder. I use the word cute only to setup the following: a majority of the variety of men's fashion out there, of what I've seen anyway, really isn't cute. Obviously I have a specific definition of cute in my mind when I'm thinking this. I guess it would be one of cuteness, as I see it in Japanese culture. An overly childlike like appearance that emphasizes innocence, helplessness and the like. From hello kitty to Rilakkuma accessories and dolls, Lolita fashion, frilly skirts and dresses, you get the idea. For a guy to match this definition of cute, it might require something dramatic in a fashion sense, to wear women's clothing. I'm purposefully overemphasizing this one single aspect of things, maybe because it's one that I can most relate too... but with that said, why would one want to look cute in the first place? Now, not to completely limit the scope of the question one might also ask, why would a man want to dress like a woman at all?

In general, I can think of a few reasons why a man would want to dress up as a woman. In the case of wota and or otaku, my guess for the most prominent reason would be an attempt to emulate their favorite idol, manga or anime character or to otherwise pay tribute to something they know and enjoy. If you're a man, and that idol or character just happens to be a female, why not go all the way when showing your support. People cosplay all the time, that would mostly be the same thing right? Doesn't matter if it's a "sexy" character or a "cute" character, tho it might make one think twice about going through with it, they'd still just be doing it for the fun of it all. They might want to experience that feeling of being sexy or cute or whatever, and well, this is one step closer to that.

Personally, I've never given the idea of wearing women's clothing much thought. That said, it might be an interesting thing to try. I like singing along to my favorite songs, tho I’m not the best singer by a long shot. I like dancing along with the songs, tho I’m never really able to get all the moves right. I might just like dressing up as my favorite idol, be it a dress, skirt or sparkly getup. Sure the mental image might conjure up a mess, but I’d be having fun doing it and that’s what matters really. And hey, maybe someone will find it to be cute.

Outside of the wota / otaku subcultures, there are a myriad of other reasons why someone might want to do a bit of cross dressing. Too many unique situations and perspectives to delve into. One however, is dressing as a maid. This scenario, I would say could be one of domination and submission, tho most definitely not always the case. I guess “domination and submission” sounds a little extreme, it’s more of a relationship, or appearance of mutual respect. An otherwise masculine, “manly man,” might give this a try to attempt to step outside of the stereotype. I personally pride myself in my independence, freedom and not having to rely on others; and at the same time, I’m not particularly fond of having people rely on me, it sets up too many expectations (tho I’ll make exceptions). As this maid character, it could be an escape, a chance to let my guard down. To serve someone, whether literally waiting on them or just giving them something to look at, there would be some solace in the fact that it’s just an act of sorts and that I could go back to being “me” whenever I see fit.

I’ve really not put too much into all of this, but I would say, whatever the reason, I kind of get the appeal. If it didn’t take so much effort to create a costume or go shopping or whatever, I might give it a try sooner than later. It might be fun, or might not be for me, but I’d probably have a good time laughing at myself in either case.

Passion

Anyone who has had the opportunity to really sit down and talk to me can usually come to realize, I'm a pretty simple person. I'm fairly content with just "being" if that makes sense. Observing the world around me while not actually living in it so to speak.

It wasn't until about two years ago that I was able to find something that allowed me to feel connected to that world. That something, as niche as it may be, was Japanese music. While I'm still predominantly an observer, Japanese music or well, Japanese culture in general is something that I've really been able to get into. It's a piece of my life that I've been able to "live."

I’ve never really been into music in one sense. Until recently I haven’t owned any tapes or CDs, just passingly listened to whatever top 40 was playing on the radio on my drive to and from work and school. In another sense tho, I’ve been making various degrees of music since I was very young, using keyboards, synthesizers and computers, was in the church and school choir, as well as the school concert and marching bands, and currently I’m teaching myself to play the drums. In any case, once I discovered Japanese music, I kinda felt passionate about listening to music in a way that I had never really done before.

I’ve always had an interest in history and other social studies, of which Japan sparked an extra bit curiosity for whatever reason. Perhaps it's because I can relate to the Japanese way of thinking and personality, as opposed to the stereotypical American society and expectations; or perhaps it's because there is so much history to explore. Or simply, maybe it's because of the cute aspects of the culture that I find so adorably so. In any case, Japanese music has truly changed my life. I have found passion in an otherwise passionless existence.

Last year I quit my job and am pursuing a college degree, a big part of which will involve studying the Japanese language, history and culture. I recently went to Japan and had a great time. Seeing Hello! Project in concert as part of that was such an great experience. And when I got back, I got a tattoo, a tribute to all of these recent changes in my life; or well, as equally as it is a tribute to Tokunaga Chinami, I'll admit. It is an obsession. With limited ways to channel the energy that I do have, this obsession has become a big part of me. In some ways it's hard to explain, but in the end, it makes me happy.
 
Aspirations

So with all that, what is the end game? What does the future hold? Well, I'm always going with the flow and don't have many goals really. Like I said, I'm fairly content with just "being." But I do have at least one thing in mind. For the longest time I've wanted children. For various reasons it's a tough scenario to aspire to, but it's something that I'm really looking forward to some day. It may be just a biological drive, or maybe even a bit selfish, but deep down I would really love to be a father. I would love to raise a child I can call my own, to guide their lives and provide for them the best that I know how. I would love to share my experiences, share my world and knowledge with someone as they grow to be independent.

From the early ons of changing diapers, their first steps, their first words; to their first day of school and  learning to drive, I want to be there. I want to be there to comfort them when they're down and out, I want to encourage them when they need that extra push to do better, and I want to honor and celebrate with them while they're at their best. I want to give my all to them.

I know it will be hard, but I'll love every moment of it.